Drinks & Talks, Feel Good, Let's Grow!, Lifestyle, Personal
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I Created My Own Solo-writing Retreat

black woman with headwrap reading book in hotelroom

For the longest time I’ve been wanting to go on a retreat. Either a yoga retreat or a writing retreat. So when my mom – who always inspires and motivate me to do things that can bring me one step closer to my goals – was here, we went to look for possible writing retreats. I honestly saw some great ones! From La Muse to Writer’s Cruise and so many more.

They all seemed lovely, but not financially attainable at that moment. It’d require quite the period of saving and I needed the retreat asap. I felt like I needed a break from the daily life and go somewhere where I could read and write in peace. So, I booked myself a hotel. I wanted to stay in a little house in the middle of nowhere after a friend’s tip, but the idea alone nearly gave my sister a heart attack. So to comfort her, I opted for something closer. And the houses that was nearby looked like perfect locations for a real life ‘Get out’. There were no reviews by black people whatsoever.

Call me paranoid, but there’s no need to put myself in positions that’d have my friends calling me dumbass if anything was to happen to me. Which they would before they go looking for me. Anywho, I booked a hotel and created my own retreat. And here’s what I got out of it.

Get comfortable with the uncomfortable

For the upcoming three days and nights, I was to be my own date. I had breakfast in the restaurant alone. Went on a solo-coffee date in the lobby. And whereas many people think it’s terrifying or embarrassing; I experienced it as marvelous.

Of course, it’s a little awkward at first. But that’s literally your own insecurity. When you think people are looking at you, trust me they’re too busy minding their own business. It’s just your own subconscious telling you that you must be looking sad if you’re having breakfast or coffee on your own. But you’re not sad looking, unless you’re literally wishing you were with someone and missing them. Then I’m pretty sure, your facial expression is indeed sad.

But, it doesn’t have to be. It’s good to try and go on dates alone. It allows you to get comfortable with the uncomfortable: going on solo-dates.

Be kind to yourself

‘Don’t be too harsh on yourself.’
‘Be kind to yourself. ‘

These are some of the things I hear all the time.Well, guess what…Now that I was left to myself and my thoughts, I really had to be kind to myself. I didn’t getaway just to relax, align myself and start at my new job fresh, but also to write. The first part was going off quite well…The latter part not so much. And it was very frustrating, because that was the whole point! To getaway and write in peace. Yet, instead I found myself texting my sister, my boyfriend and my friends… And then it hit me: I was sabotaging myself like I usually do when it comes to my writing.

Whenever it’s not going as easy breezy as I’d like it to go or it’s taking too long to finish, I look for distraction disguised as ‘housekeeping’. Now, I was at a hotel where I didn’t have to worry about cleaning up the apartment or anything else for that matter,which was quite confrontational. But as I spoke to my sister, she once again told me: ‘Be kind  to yourself. This is your first retreat.’ And she was right. This was my very first time just my, myself and I and my thoughts after quite some time. It’s okay if it’s not going entirely as you had in mind. But most importantly, I got the chance to understand my thoughts.

Lush got some great shit!

Pink and White Marshmallow World Bath Bomb

Marshmallow World Bath Bomb

Okay, you might wonder what does this gotta do with your retreat? Well, I made it a point that if I stay in a hotel, it has to be with a tub. I wanted to go full zen-mode. And what better way to do it by floating in a bath with a lovely bath bomb? Or bubble bars? Or both?

I had bought some things from them in the past. Some bath bombs believing they were bubble bars (can you believe how disappointed I was when all the water did was change color?). This time I did some proper research as to what I wanted, so I could get exactly the results I wanted.

I wanted a deliciously bubbly bath, preferably sweet smelling and well some bath bombs for colorful entertainment. Which resulted in me buying the Candy Bubble Brush, Marshmallow World, Goldrush and Whoosh. And let me tell you…This is some great shit! And in case you’re wondering: am I sponsored by Lush? No, but after this post, I think they should. Hey, Lush…What’s good?

I legit didn’t wanna get out of bath. The colors were so pretty and the smell…Chileee, don’t get me started on the delicious smell. Especially the Candy Bubble Brush. It smells like the 90’s popsicle they used to sell in Holland called Speedy and kinda looks like it too. But it’s supposed to be a painting brush. Sure, Lush. Whatever floats your boat.

I digress…Point is, if you wanna go for the ultimate zen feeling. Be sure to haul some stuff from Lush.

As I’m writing this, I’ve reached the end of my retreat and will have to check out in a few hours. It was marvelous, confrontational at times, but definitely worth repeating. I’d definitely recommend it to anyone who needs a little break from the world and wants a moment by themselves to reconnect with themselves and to do the things they want sans distraction.

We all deserve moments like these.

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