I said it once and I’ll say it again, this year flew by!
But for the first time in a while I can look back at the year with a smile on my face.
I have failed, overcome and grown in a way that 3 years ago I didn’t deem as possible.
Which is why as a little shoulder pat to myself, I’m listing some of my highlights of ’17.
I finished therapy
My biggest accomplishment of this year has to be wrapping up my therapy after 2 years. This has to be the most unknown fact about me. For years I had been dealing with issues that needed attention, but you know “only crazy people get help”. Wrong. I. Needed. Help. The kind of help that no family or friend could offer me. But only after several episodes did I actually get help. Was it easy? No. Of course it’s not easy to bare myself in front of a stranger. But my therapist had such faith in me. Her faith in me, made me take on the challenge of improving myself. Most importantly she helped me grow self esteem, recognize my self worth and increase my self awareness. During these 2 years of therapy sessions, I dealt with the issues that could hinder me ever from being the best version of me. She helped me built my foundation that allows me to grow into the individual I strive to be. She might have just been doing her job, but I’m forever grateful.
I have failed
One of my goals this year was to start my online clothing store. As much as the selling process was going quite well. I can tell you that it required a lot more than just, designing the t-shirts and just sending them. Things didn’t go as I had planned. I didn’t know how to gain more clients, I wasn’t putting in enough time in promoting, I was running out of funds. All by all, it was a failure. Now you might wonder how this might be a highlight. Many people are afraid to fail. So am I. But I tried something that I’ve been wanting to do (and still dream of doing) and I failed, but…I didn’t die! As a matter of fact, this was a chance to learn how to deal with failure. Instead of acting as if the world comes to an end, I can actually learn a thing or two from the mistakes I’ve made and use this knowledge for future reference! Also, once you’ve failed on this scale, you’ll become comfortable with making mistakes and not take it too hard.
I got a new job
If you have read my post from SMART to SMARTER you’d know that one of my goals for 2017 was to get a new job. I had been working for my previous employer ever since I moved back to Holland, but there wasn’t much room left for me to continue to grow within the company. Also, was it affecting my mental health. If I wanted to actually wrap up my therapy sessions, getting a new job was necessary! It wasn’t easy and I got sidetracked, but I refocused, set my goal and as a birthday gift to myself I got myself a new job. A job that respects my room for growth outside of the workplace, who aspires growth on the work floor, has great colleagues and pays the bills (can’t leave that one out)!
My first public speech
I will not forget the way I felt when my sister asked me speech at her wedding. My stomach tied in knots as I pictured myself stuttering in front of the whole crowd, having to hear my own voice through the speakers. I immediately said no. I’m not a shy person, I’m just not great at talking in front of crowds. Put on a tune and tell me to dance in front of 1000’s of people, I will do it without thinking. But speaking? No. I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t do it. However, secretly it’s something that I have been wanting to do (yes, there are many things I want to do. This is just the tip of the iceberg). Plus, I know how much it would mean to my big sister. So, I said yes. My sister even gave me the chance to share my speech with my mother. Wasn’t that nice of her? Yet when D-day arrived, my mother and I had prepared zilch. Hell, even during the reception I was still thinking about what the hell I was gonna talk about. When the wedding planner came up to me and asked me if I was ready, I genuinely said no. I wasn’t ready! Dafuq was I gonna say? But then, there I was, with that god awful microphone in my hand, in front of family and friends and it just…came out! I did my first public speech, sans stuttering mind you. And I liked it. The performer in me loved being there. She hated hearing her own voice still, but she liked it. And we want to keep doing it.
Man, now that I think of it. This year was filled with highlights. From watching my kidbrother’s team become Dutch Champion, to watching my sister tie the knot, to my grandmother coming to Holland after nearly 15 years…I could go on and on. One thing is for sure, I’m beyond grateful for the people I got to spend all these wonderful experiences with. he idea that this is just the beginning gets me excited for 2018!
What are your highlights of 2017?